Shame on Me

Today, Martin had another attack. It was quite severe, and frightened him. It didn't frighten me, as he omitted letting me know until after the fact. He thinks he is protecting me by not informing me each time he gets an attack, but it only causes me anxiety. They are coming more often, and I just pray that he will make it until they can try to help him. We go on January 5th to see the cardiologist and find out when they will do the next proceedure. The plan is to go in through his femoral artery up into his heart and use what is called a roto-blade to drill the blockage clear. Sounds good to me. I try not to think past that point, as I want to come out of this with my honey doing well.

Life goes on even with difficulties. Isn't it funny how you think something won't happen and then it does? For instance, this afternoon, Little Joe was asleep in Sissy's car and she wanted to do some shopping. I told her that I would stay in the car with Little Joe, and to take her time. I closed my eyes and prayed for awhile, then listened to the radio. Little Joe was sound asleep, and then, after about 50 minutes, he awoke wanting his bottle. I got out of the front seat, and into the back seat, unhooked those baby seat harnesses from hell, and took Little Joe into my arms. Juggling him, I got his bottle ready and we sat back into the front seat so that he could contentedly slurp away. He drank the whole thing, burped and settled down on my shoulder. While I was patting his backside and talking to him, I thought that I hadn't seen a poopie diaper since yesterday. Being stuffed with Little Joe in the front seat of Sissy's SUV would be a terrible place for him to decide to unload, and just as I was thinking about this, sure enough, he filled his diaper. Okay, I thought I would just let him finish, and then take him to the back seat and change him. I gave him a good five minutes to do his business, and then to the back seat we went. I got out a new diaper, some wet wipes, and put his blanket down. After unsnapping his onesie, I untaped the diaper and PHEWWY! he had certainly done his business. Okay, I had this. Working efficiently, I removed the huge offering, and cleaned him with the wipes. As I was setting the mess to the side and picking up the new diaper, I heard a sound that nightmares are made of. With his little legs firmly in my hand and elevated, and before I could get the new diaper under him, he gave a mighty grunt and the gates of baby poo were opened. The new offering flowed from him in a mighty wave, and covered the blanket, the onsie, and part of Sissy's leather covered seat. I panicked. I had already put the wipes away, as I am so efficient you know, and with one hand had to hold his fat little legs up, along with his fat little behind so that he would not be poo covered. With the other hand, I had to paw through the diaper bag for the wipes. The tail of his onsie fell into the goo, and when he wiggled, flapped onto his back. This was getting out of hand! Using all of my mommy experience, I dropped the wipes, still holding legs and behind and folded his blanket over the mess. I quickly grabbed the wipes, and began to clean him. I soon had a pile of poopie wipes, 2 poopie diapers, a poopie onesie and a poopie blanket. Since the poo had gotten on his back, I had to wipe that off too, and then take all his little clothes off. Now, I have a naked baby in the back of an SUV parked in front of the store, juggling poo and trying to find clean clothes. By now, Little Joe had had enough, and began to let me know. I dumped the diaper bag out looking for a new outfit, making sure that I didn't dump it on the huge mess that seemed to grow bigger with each passing moment. Finally I had him diapered and clean, and had found a little fleece outfit to put on him. All I could think of was how Sissy was going to react when she saw the mess in the back seat of her car. I wanted to put Little Joe in the front seat to clean the back seat area, but the carrier was on the other side of the disaster, and I didn't want to just set him up in the front seat. Holding him in my left arm, I eventually was able to gather up the dirty items, wipe the seat and my hands and get everything back into the diaper bag. I used about half of the wipies just cleaning my hands. As I stood up from cleaning everything, Sissy finally came out of the store. She wondered why I was standing next to the car holding Little Joe instead of having him in his car seat. I just told her that he needed changing, and all was well. I put him in his car seat, buckled him up and gave him his binky. We drove home, talking of the usual stuff, and Sissy dropped me off at home. It wasn't until I got out that I saw the poopie blanket that was wrapped around the poopie diaper and onsie, and lying on the floor board. I am a stinker, because I just went in the house, and thought that she would figure it out when she got the baby out of the car. Shame on me. So, things go on as usual, no matter what the situation.