Christmas

Finally! Christmas has come. We are all so blessed with so many things, but most especially the love and happiness that Christmas brings to our little loved ones. We had the Christmas Eve party at Becky's as planned, and it was the most wonderful chaos! Dinner was the crab and shrimp, chicken tenders and fries with a plethora of fabulous desserts. Becky made some bars that were peanut butter cookie on the bottom, oreo cookies in the middle (whole oreos) and brownies on top. Good grief, sugar attack just thinking about them, but they were wonderful. Marie brought mini-cupcakes, red velvet, carrot, and chocolate. Nana-mee, who is Joe's mama, (her real name is Amelia) brought a double chocolate fudge cake, and there was also fudge, and an enormous cheesecake. Believe it or not, I nibbled so that I would not get burned out too fast.

We handed out gifts, to the children first, and of course the one that had the most fun was Little Joe, tearing paper and ignoring the contents of the boxes. Wonderful gifts were given, and I got TWO new cookie jars! I am thankful for Santa GPS as the children had the parents phones out and were tracking Santa and his route. They were anxious to get home and into bed so they would not miss him. The party disbanded with hugs and kisses and home we went. Sleep came easily for us as we were so tired, and soon, it was time to get up for church. Martin dressed in his suit and I wore a new red blouse, so we looked quite ready for Christmas service. As I got in the car, Martin handed me a little ring box, and in it was a gorgeous ruby ring. Martin surprises me every year with a piece of jewlery, he knows how much I love it. He starts early in the year, scouts the pawn shops, and puts something in lay-away. He knows how I love rubies, they mean so much to me because my birthday is in July, and we married in July.

I took a large bag of candy canes to church to give out to everyone, and on the label, the story of the Christmas Candy Cane was printed. The choir was so lovely, and the spirit was so strong, and I could not help but to sniffle the whole time. I was pretty wrapped up in the service, and did not notice that Martin was acting out of sorts. He got up to step out, and usually at Church this means that he has to go to the men's room. I am always happy for him to go to the men's room at church, because Martin thinks he can pass a stinker and no one will notice. Trouble is, since we are sitting together, people have to wonder if it was Martin or me who poluted the air. I am hoping that those who know me will realize that I would NEVER pass a stinker in church. I have been guilty of this in the store sometimes, but that is only because it sneaks out when I cough. In the 40 years of marriage we have been together, it has only been in the last two years, that I have convinced Martin that "no, it was not silent nor was it not smelly. PLEASE get up and go out if you have to pass a stinker" He has been good to comply, and so, I thought he was going out for just such that reason. Well, this time a stinker was not the culprit. Martin was having an attack of arm pain that came on quickly and was quite severe. When he got out into the foyer, he used his nitro-spray, and then had to use it again after 5 minutes. I was clueless, by Robby got up and went out with him, and sat there until the attack passed. I knew nothing about any of it. Martin told me after the service what had happened and I felt so bad that I did not help him with it. We went home to rest for awhile, and then we went to the other Martin's house with his family for Christmas dinner.

For those of you who don't know the other Martin, he is Bobbie Jo's husband. We have stayed close together since her death, and he is a wonderful son. I love him, and cherish him. Each Christmas day, we go to his mother's home to be with his family for a down-home Christmas dinner that is worth waiting a year to experience. Everyone makes us feel just like we were born into the family, and we love being with them. Martin makes sure that there is something there for me to eat each year, and since I cannot have meat, milk or eggs, that is a challenge sometimes. When Bobbie Jo was alive, she always made lots of stuff for me, and he is keeping the tradition going. This year, it was shark chili. That's right, shark chili. Guess what? It was GOOD! I can have seafood, and this was really something. The shark meat tasted like white meat chicken and the chili was really delicious. Rose, Martin's mother is an angel, and every year, she makes traditional, unbelievable, fabulous fruit cake for me. There are so many fruits and nuts in this fruitcake, that it is hard to find the cake! How I love it! She is such a dear, she starts in November looking for the dried fruits. I can't even say how much I love her, she is so precious. She sends a loaf home for me each year, and I slice it really thin so that it will last for a while. It is hard to wait all year to get some more, but the wait is worth it!

When we got back home, I made Martin lie down. We watched TV and the evening passed quietly with his sister Cheryl coming over to visit. She and I are close, and I love it when she comes. Cheryl and I were watching something for old ladies, and Martin decided that he would go and play on the computer. He was in there for awhile, and then he came out and said he didn't feel good. He used his nitro-spray, but after 5 minutes, the pain was increasing. I started to panic, and he said to wait, he would try the nitro-spray again. In a few minutes, the pain began to subside, but I was really nervous and wanted to call 911 to get him to the hospital. He assured me that things were better and went to bed. I got in bed a while later, and he tapped me on the arm saying, "I'm scared". I begged him to go to the hospital, and he said he was okay, just feeling scared. We talked about why he was scared, and he said that he felt he had no control over what was happening to him. I agreed, and we whispered for a long time while holding each other, talking about our faith, the afterlife, and the fact that miracles happen every day. Each time I hold him like that, I cherish each second, because I wonder how many more chances I will have. I pray constantly for so many things, for strength, for comfort, for Martin to have those things, I pray for assurance that Heavenly Father is guiding us, and I pray for knowlege of His will. Mostly I pray that Martin will not be frightened, and can have peace knowing that Heavenly Father will be with him. Martin and I express our love several times a day, touch each other gently, have little kisses and talk. It feels like there is a ravening monster ready to tear our lives apart at any time, and we are holding it back with our tokens of affection and acknowlegment of the love that is so powerful between us. In spite of everything, I feel like he will get the help he needs to extend his life. I think there is so much for him to do still, I really do. I am so grateful that we had this Christmas together, and I pray for many more. Since we are married for eternity, we will have eternal Christmases, but I want more here on this earth. Your prayers have helped so much. I feel a net of love and concern surrounding Martin and me. How thankful I am for that!